YOU KNOW ITS TIME TO GO HOME WHEN:
1. You have absolutely no idea where your shoes are.
2. You’ve just had to get someone to help you pull your pants up in the ladies room.
3. You suddenly decide you want to kick someone’s ass.
4. In your last trip to “pee” you realize you now look more like Tammy Faye Baker than the goddess you were just four hours ago.
5. You drop your 3:00 a.m. burrito on the floor, pick it up and carry on eating.
6. You start crying.
7. There are less than three hours before you’re due to start work.
8. You’ve found a deeper side to the office nerd.
9. The man you’re flirting with used to be your 5th grade teacher.
10. The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and sing becomes strangely overwhelming.
11. You’ve forgotten where you live.
12. You’ve started to sound like Jessie Ventura from the cigarettes you’ve smoked, because (as you’ve mentioned like 10x’s by now) you only smoke when you drink.
13. You yell at the bartender, who (you think) cheated you by giving you just tonic, but that’s just because you can no longer taste the gin or vodka.
14. You think you’re in bed, but your pillow feels strangely like pizza.
15. You start every conversation with a booming, “Don’t take this the wrong way but…”
16. You fail to notice that the toilet lid’s down when you sit on it.
17. Your sloppy hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves.
18. You’re tired so you just sit on the floor (and why not!).
19. You show your friends that girls can pee standing up if they really want to.
20. You start making-out with middle-eastern men on dance floors
Found this list and got a chuckle out of it, some of them I can unfortunately relate to :o)
Sorry to have been a bit M.I.A the past few days, took a mental health day yesterday. Turns out reading the news online right before bedtime is not so much my thing, haven’t had nightmares like that since I was a child. So I decided to comfort myself with what I thought would be a day in my pjs, bad tv and possibly some ice cream. Instead, I happily ran errands for my mom and took care of the babe for a good chunk of the day – I will say this; having a little one around makes everything in the world seem ok. No matter what awful stories you may hear about and or read about (particularly on the 11 o’clock news), seeing a little pip squeak get a kick out of a a good tickle makes everything seem like rainbows and lolli pops again. I am thankful to be able to come home to that 🙂
Oh and also thank you to everyone who commented on my last post. I was being a grump, and everyone was right – I need to get a hobby, enjoy time on my own!!! Sooo I signed up to volunteer for a campaign which is underway in Massachusetts right now. I will get back to you all and let you know how its going once I have my first experience with it!